Look Down for Safety, But Please Look Up for Fun!

This summer, I had the joy and privilege of living in New York City for five weeks while my daughter danced with American Ballet Theatre during their summer intensive (housing was not provided, hence our mother-daughter Gilmore Girls adventure). It was a true country-mouse, city-mouse experience for me. And just so we are clear, I am the country mouse. But I am also no stranger to the incredible Big Apple. When I was growing up in New Jersey, our family would spend Saturdays in the city when my sister took classes at the Juilliard school, and I owned those few blocks around Lincoln Center and felt deep affection for every pizza parlor in that vicinity. Back in my early twenties, I loved fun and romantic weekend escapades with my New York City boyfriend as we explored coffee shops, museums, night clubs, and rooftops. And I have visited the Great White Way on more than a few occasions to see memorable and inspiring Broadway performances. But, while I am not a complete stranger, it is fair to say New York City and I were getting to know one another again, reacquainting ourselves if you will, after a very long hiatus.

New York City is indeed a fascinating place, and I loved exploring boutique shops, the famous Strand bookstore, Central Park and the carousel, incredible restaurants, Chelsea Market, and the intoxicating flower district. We attended two ballet performances at the Metropolitan Opera House for the first time ever (thank you ABT for student discount tickets!), and it was an experience beyond measure. The ballerinas were flawless. And the building, with its red velvet walls, sparkling chandeliers, and Rolex wall clock, had me in awe. I perseverated about the hundreds of thousands of people since 1966, the common and the famous, who sat in the exact seats in which were seated (although we were toward the back of the theatre, so I am guessing the famous people didn’t sit exactly in our seats). We loved seeing the musical Company in the intimate Bernard B. Jacobs Theatre and I was grateful for a gender bent performance that was better than the original, and supremely humbled knowing live theater was finally back following the Covid19 pandemic. There was just so much sparkle and so much excitement!

But I have to say this country mouse was a little overstimulated during her first week of living amidst the buildings that scrape the sky. And then over the course of the four weeks that followed, I relaxed, settled in, and started noticing the details and nuances of big city living. And big city surviving. For example, on trash day in New York City in the heat of summer, when my nostrils were challenged beyond measure, I devised a game called “how long can I hold my breath?”. My longest record to date is half of one of the long NYC blocks (or one full short block) before almost passing out from lack of breath or asphyxiation. On every single daily walk during those dog days of summer, I debated if whether the water I felt on the top of my head and on my face that fell from above was from the air conditioners that were precariously hanging from apartment windows, excrement from pigeons who were ubiquitous, or someone ceremonially peeing from their apartment window or rooftop. All three are realistic possibilities.

But big city surviving for me really came down to one thing: the sidewalk. It was a real, honest to goodness, landmine. City sidewalk obstacles at a minimum, include any and all the following: ridiculously uneven cement and pavement; metal grates that precariously cover the steaming abyss between the street and the subway; sticky chewing gum people chose to spit out instead of neatly wrapping in a tissue; actual garbage, because trash cans every few feet are not convenient enough; NYC sewer covers (that are stamped “N.Y.C. Sewer, Made in India”); any number of unidentified liquids including dog pee, human urine, soda, and coffee; rats who scurry past your toes at night; cigarette butts, some extinguished and some still lit; and the pièce de résistance, dog poop from little, medium, and large-sized dogs that owners chose not pick up. Remember the game we played as children “step on a crack and you’ll break your mother’s back”? New Yorkers are navigating way more than cracks when they step outside! But what I learned is that while watching where I stepped out of sheer survival was important, occasionally I needed to look up, because looking up was so much more fun!

When I looked up, my other senses loved what they saw, heard, and felt. I loved to pick out the unending assortment of foreign languages being spoken in the city, and I challenged myself to identify from which country the person had come. I loved watching people scurry to work, looking like they were talking to themselves as they fielded business calls using their AirPods before they got to their brick-and-mortar office. In looking up, I saw beautiful buildings that towered above and genuinely amazed me; I still cannot wrap my head around how buildings that tall structurally stay up and not fall over like a stack of Legos. And I secretly named the men who without fail, stood on the corner of 28th and Broadway and smoked and sold marijuana; we have not yet formally met, but I called them Axel, William, Harry, and Rocky.

I adored the variety and color of “Mom and Pop” stores and pray they survive as rent prices continue to increase, and I was fascinated with the store on 27th that sells only men’s Hanes t-shirts and imposter Rolex watches. I pondered on the daily about why the owner thought to put those two products together, and best I could surmise, he was genuinely inspired by Marlon Brando in A Streetcar Named Desire. I loved the ridiculous number of hat stores in New York City and every time I passed one, I thought about how much I wished I looked good in a hat. If I looked up from the perilous sidewalk, I saw the carts selling hot pretzels, hotdogs, and roasted nuts, all long-held delicious traditions in New York City. I was happily distracted and amused by the canines of every breed and mixed breed, shape, size, and color who treat the city as their playground. And may I add, it is not unusual to see urban dogs in booties, Chanel and Gucci jackets, and ear accessories!

In looking up, I came to respect the very important personal space boundaries that one must maintain as one walks among fellow humans on the sidewalk, and I decided that delivery drivers and emergency personnel have the most challenging jobs in the city. Citi Bikes makes bike sharing super popular and easy, and one must look up to appreciate the wide variety of people riding two-wheelers, many of whom honestly look like they should probably not be on a bike (And most without helmets. Did their mothers teach them nothing?). Hands down, I have never in my life seen more beautiful and unique dressing. No matter what my mother taught me about fashion do’s and do not’s, I have learned in New York City, everything and anything goes! Really friends, anything. My ears were focused on the colorful curse words that decorated a conversation much like the sprinkles on an ice cream cone. And if I looked up, I looked into the eyes of the suffering homeless man or woman whose address changes daily, and I felt deep sadness and wrestled with the concept of inhumanity.

Every day for five weeks, New York City challenged me with something different or taught me something new. In my last week in the city for example, I debated the inconvenience of walking the streets in pouring rain and getting my feet and clothing soaking wet, with the benefit of the rain washing away all the horrific smells and giving Gotham a much-needed bath. I decided being soaking wet was a small sacrifice worth making! And while the sidewalk was indeed an obstacle course, I learned looking down wasn’t completely disappointing. I got excited every time I stepped over one of the hundreds of multi-colored hearts people spray painted on the sidewalks; the hearts signified hope and were like the crumbs of bread Gretel scattered so she could find her way home. But I always yearned to look up. In looking up, I saw creativity. I saw industriousness. I saw beauty. I saw happiness. I saw insanity. And I saw life. The city that never sleeps also never disappoints; and whether you are the city mouse or the country mouse, do look down for safety, but please look up for fun!